"Embodiment" is a term that's flung around liberally in the sexuality space. But what is it exactly and how can we use it expand our sexual experiences?
WHAT IS IT?
Many of us think of embodiment as 'watching' or 'listening' to our bodies or our breath for example. Embodiment is more nuanced than that though. Watching or listening suggests that mind and body are separate, and whilst that may have its own benefits, embodiment is different.
Embodiment is the merging of the abstract and intelligent mind with the body's own intellect. Rather that watching the breath, you ARE the breath. Think of embodiment as your entire intelligence, body and mind, being experienced as a fluid union that is attuned to the world.
An example of embodiment might be singing, where music and voice are integrated. Embodiment is not segregating the intelligence of the head from the body and putting it in charge. Rather it is the surrendering of the mind to the body, allowing the body to influence the mind and incorporating the intelligence of the two.
Descartes = buzzkill
WHY IS IT IMPORTANT?
Not being able to turn off your mind can be the ultimate buzzkill in the bedroom. And that's where learning the art of embodiment can make all the difference. It's a way of tuning the mind into the body so that it is one as opposed to either/or.
When we are disembodied, it can be difficult, even impossible to become aroused, either sexually or in life. Embodied sex on the other hand, can be a whole other level of connection, verging on the mind altering. Who doesn't want that?
HOW CAN I DO IT?
Euphemia recommends regularly tuning into one body part and making it a practice.
You might find that singing, swaying to music, practicing Tai-Chi or playing an instrument is an embodied experience.Whatever you're doing, set your awareness to the unity of body and mind intelligence and then begin to take that awareness to your lovemaking.
As well as recommending embodiment as a life practice, we recommend On For Her and Überlube to help bring a more instantaneuos melding of the body and mind. As a practice, we recommend Kegel Balls to bring greater awareness to the vagina and vulva.
I hope that explains embodiment more fully and that it brings greater joy to life and love.
Early philosophers like Descartes theorised that the body was superior to and disconnected from the mind, claiming that “there is a great difference between mind and body, inasmuch as body is by nature always divisible, and the mind is entirely indivisible... the mind or soul of man is entirely different from the body.”
The idea of the body influencing the mind is a relatively modern concept. "This is not just the innocuous and obvious claim that we need a body to reason; rather, it is the striking claim that the very structure of reason itself comes from the details of our embodiment... Thus, to understand reason we must understand the details of our visual system, our motor system, and the general mechanism of neural binding. George Lakoff and Rafeal Núñez