Step 1. Desire

Our motto is that for butt sex to be enjoyable from the outset, the desire must be strong. Have you watched porn/read erotica/fantasised about one of the most taboo of sexual delights and been aroused by it? Do you masturbate to thoughts of anal? Then it’s time to delve into the Den of Dark Delights.

When you are including anal on the menu, make sure it's dessert. Think of anal sex as last base. Full arousal of the body and mind is the best precursor for any type of anal play. You have to want it.

Step 2. Equipment

Use lube - you cannot have anal sex without lots of lubricant. Silicone lube designed for butts makes anal play a dream and Sassy water-based is ideal to use with silicone toys. 

Use toys - butt plugs with a flared base are specifically designed for anal penetration. Full penetration with a penis or dildo is a Level 10, so start with a Level 3-5 to see how you're feeling.

Use gloves and condoms - you can still catch STIs during anal penetration so please rubber-up if there is any risk of STI transmission. Our top sneaky tip is to explore the hole-y grail using black latex or nitrile gloves as your first step towards the buried treasure.

This gives a smooth and silky experience once covered in lube, the erotic snap of the glove as you put it on adds to the fun, and when you're finished it makes for easy clean-up, just take off and toss (... the glove). 

Step 3. Communication

We will discuss negotiation, consent and communication in more depth in another post. For now, be clear from the outset of what’s on and what’s not. Take every moment as it comes and check in with your partner throughout. 

Remember, anal should never be painful (it's a good rhyme so easy to remember!) so two lines to have in your head as the receiver are :

"mmm slightly slower would feel great"

"bit more lube please sexy"  

As the penetrator-extraordinaire, your two questions are :

"how does that feel?"

"what would make this more perfect for you? Slower? Faster?"

 

 (Image by Bairachnyi Dmitri)

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