Knowing what you like can be a challenging journey. Sometimes it’s easier to start with what you don’t like. So, I recommend starting by making a list of things that turn you off in each sense category. Then you can try to come up with the opposite to see if you can start to create a list of things you like. Do you like sweet or savoury? Is it the same for smells? What type of touch irritates you? What makes you purr? The more you know, the better you will be at experiencing pleasure.
There are always three people in a couple - you, your partner and the relationship. While you each enjoy different ways to activate your senses, what sensual delights do you share? How well do you know your partner's sensory pleasures and displeasures? After writing a list of turn-ons and offs for yourselves, try to write down as many as you can for your partner and then compare notes.
It’s time to do a sensory audit of our toys, lingerie and lube. Most toys focus on the sense of touch, so you probably know how yours ‘feels good’ but can you go deeper? Does the pleasure come from the feel of the material, its hardness, its mechanical functions or all of the above? Where do you feel the pleasurable sensations in your body? Are they localised or does it spread?
Lingerie has the added benefit of both appealing to our visual and touch senses. How does the material feel, and in kind, how does it make YOU feel? Describe the pleasure you get from looking at yourself, or your partner, wearing it.
Lube can be practical, but it's also very sensual, does it feel as good outside as it does inside your body? If flavoured, how does it taste?